Blame it on lack of sleep...

Why New Monasticism Part 2

2011-10-16T08:42:00.006-05:00

This is the second follow up post to this post.

Why are you interested in communal living and what you hope to learn?

I have always been someone who prefers doing things in community. Community strengthens me and, honestly, is just more fun. It is easier to take risks if there is someone there to do it with you. And in this day and age, being a follower of The Way requires risk-taking.

It means taking the risk of trial and error to learn how to evangelize in a way that doesn’t turn people off. (Megan Davidson and I did this recently by approaching a young couple and asking to join them. I would not have done this without the moral support of another person with me.) It means taking the risk to learn how to be truly, truly connected with the poor. It means taking the risk of learning how to sacrifice your life in the name of the Kingdom of God. It means taking the risk of making your faith public, of asking people to look at the way you live your life and saying with Paul, “Follow me as I follow Christ."

Jesus is calling us to learn new creative ways to follow him in a postmodern world. How can I lead the church to take that leap if I myself do not take risks for my faith? In my view the best way for me to learn this is alongside others who share that passion. John Wesley’s wisdom “On a Catholic Spirit” transfers to this setting as well. He said, “If your heart is as my heart, then take my hand.” A risky, revolutionary, sacrificial faith is best lived hand in hand.

Why New Monasticism Part 1

2011-10-14T08:33:00.002-05:00

This is the first follow up post to this post.

Read about the 12 Marks of a New Monasticism and write about the “mark” that most interests you.

I find the the 12 Marks of a New Monasticism each very energizing. The mark that is most interesting to me at this time in my Christian life is “Sharing economic resources with fellow community members and the needy among us.”

Up until the last few years I had never been a tither. I always felt that if I committed my time and my vocation to God, then I could keep my money. I am only now beginning to realize that my sanctification in my twenties has centered on moving me toward becoming a deeply generous person. It was in seminary that I was, in essence, worn down until I accepted that economics are of central concern in the Kingdom of God. It was in my first year as sole pastor that I realized that individual and communal unease with issues of money is a spiritual problem that points to a lack of deep commitment to the things of God. This was when I myself began to tithe to my church. It has been since becoming ordained in June 2011 that my spiritual restlessness has pointed me toward a path of relationship-based giving.

A tithe to my church isn’t enough anymore. I would like to be proactive and prepared to make a difference financially in the lives of people that I encounter. My aim in pursuing a place in the Palmer House is to start a relational tithe akin to what is described in Claiborne and Wilson-Hartgrove’s book Becoming the Answer to Our Prayers.

Times, they are a-changing... (Aka the Palmer House News)

2011-10-13T08:33:00.000-05:00

So I've recently done something that I don't often do...I changed my life plan. A few months ago I moved into my very own apartment--alone--for the first time. I did this for several reasons: 1. because I never thought I'd be able to live alone and 2. because I knew that it's highly likely that I'll have to live alone at some point in my future as an itinerant pastor who is not married. So I figured, better get used to it in a city where I have friends than in a new city with no friends and a new job. And, as it turns out, I was ready for it. I love living alone. Sure, there were things that I missed about living with people, and my dog was pretty miserable without a backyard. But I love living alone and I had made a nice little life for myself.

Meanwhile, I got ordained and was feeling very spiritually restless. I'd come to a point where I thought my commitment to God through my vocation was enough, but my personal life wasn't. I realized that I've been wanting to take a deeper step into a more intentional and active Christian life for a long time. What that looked like I wasn't sure but I was sure that God was moving me toward something. So one day driving west on I30 coming home from a clergy book group meeting, I said yes to whatever it was and asked God to show it to me when the time came.

Well the time has come. Because of a lot of important experiences and conversations in ministry and with my friends, mostly about money (along with the book Becoming the Answer to Our Prayers by Claiborne and Wilson-Heartgrove), I've moved into the Pheobe Palmer New Monastic House in Fort Worth. Its is a Christian community committed to learning and showing a new way of being Christian through prayer, presence, gifts, service, and witness. So I broke my lease (which causes me all kinds of anxiety still) and have moved half my stuff in.

I'm not a person who takes changes quickly. It took my ten months to starting thinking on the idea of moving alone, decide on it, find an apartment, and actually do it. And I was happy, really happy with my arrangement. So I'll be honest, I've got some mixed feelings about all this. I preach all the time about God's calling on our lives to take the big risk and making sacrifices for the Kingdom of God. How easy it is to slip into Sunday Christianity, how the world needs Christians who know the importance of their faith and really want to follow Jesus until Kingdom come. But now that I've taken my life a step closer to that way of living, I've realized that it takes giving up some of my independence. And that is a bit of a hard pill to swallow.

Now I'm learning a lesson in obedience. And reminding myself often that sure I did have a nice little life mapped out, but like Jesus said, it's only in losing your life that you gain it.

The next few post will be my answers to questions asked upon applying to the house. That will give you a deeper picture of the why.

Post-Christendom Christianity Part 1

2011-09-07T17:49:00.000-05:00

I've been doing a lot of thinking and talking about the church in 15 years. I recently said sort of flippantly that the "church in 15 years will be much more equipped to make a difference in the world than it is now." After I said it, I realized that it may just be true. So it has been a few weeks since of trying to put words to why I believe that to be the case. So here's my first sketch on where I stand on this thought.

During the last year or so, my conversations have centered around ideas from people like Phyllis Tickle, Suzanne Stabile, Adam Hamilton, and others. Below are the pieces of the puzzle that I've been slowly meshing together--maybe puzzle pieces is the wrong metaphor--to inform my thoughts on what the church is now dealing with. (Adam Hamilton is the only one of which I've actually read, so forgive the misquotes and obvious oversimplifications of their very well thought out ideas :-).

Obviously the church is changing. The question is why and what do we do with that change? The church is changing because the culture is changing. We are transitioning from modernism to postmodernism, the world is increasingly globalized, and the very long years when the church held incredible influence over the powerful western cultures (Christendom) is over. We are living in a Post-Christendom world. As a friend of mine says, you can't just slap a cross on the side of a building, call it a church, and expect people to show up. We can't just assume the people around us are going to be Christian. Churches across the board are declining. Until recently what I've heard from most people in response to these realities is something akin to "the sky is falling, the sky is falling!" Most people ask us how are we going to turn it around? I had a retiring colleague say that we young ministers have the unenviable task of trying to make something out of the mess that the church is in, and that she's just glad it's not her. I felt incredible impotent and pessimistic, fearful even, about the future of the church and the future of my place in the church until sometime last december. That is when the ideas of these visionary Christians came into my thinking--some confirming my own conviction and some simply bringing a hopeful interpretation of what the church experiences today.

...More tomorrow...

Boring Sermons or Boring People?

2011-08-31T14:00:00.000-05:00

I just read an article that addresses the question of why sermons bore us. I confess I was immediately intrigued because I find consistently offering sermons that capture the attention and imagination of my congregation a great challenge. The consistency is the problem for me, not the ability to preach a powerful sermon. I thought it might give me some insight.

The article didn't at first give me a whole lot of insight. In fact the author seems to begin blaming the audience for being bored with sermons rather than the preacher for being boring. He writes, "We joke about boring sermons, but often it is we who are boring—and bored." This drives me crazy because I hear so often older congregants and Christians blame young people for not liking church. They should rather be blaming the church for having co-opted the gospel for a certain worldview to such a degree that we don't know how to offer the good news to a different generation. We blame people outside the church for not understanding us rather than blaming ourselves for not communicating our purpose in an understandable way. This seemed the same sentiment that the author was offering--blame the listeners rather than the preacher.

I almost stopped reading and I'm glad I didn't because he immediately takes a turn and offers this gem:

We joke about boring sermons, but often it is we who are boring—and bored. We say that sermons have bored us when actually they have disappointed us, failing to be the alternative word we need, failing to be the speech that arises not from our own meager entertainments but from the life of the Spirit. "We are bored," said Benjamin, "when we don't know what we are waiting for." One thing we are waiting for is for preachers who feel the strong wind, who sense the heights above them and the abyss below and take a deep breath and preach a life-changing gospel.

Perhaps a failure to keep peoples' attention is really a failure on our part to know God. We are meant to convey the heights and depth and width of God's glory and care. Maybe we can't convey it because we do not ourselves experience and know it. Even a talent for communicating will after time grow stagnant without the Spirit of God moving within us. And that takes us seeking it out.

What to write...

2011-08-24T18:29:00.000-05:00

I've recently been encouraged to get back to writing. The first prodding came from a Benedictine nun from whom I sought spiritual direction a few weeks ago. Her name is Sister Miriam. She is a surprisingly vibrant woman in her 60's (?), emerging from the Catholic Charismatic movement of the 1970's. She's got this fantastic Bostonian accent that will surprise you every time that she opens her mouth to speak. One day at lunch she walked up to a very aged priest in her community and said, "What's cookin', good-lookin'?" She has quickly become one of my favorite people.

I told her that I'm recently ordained, the last of my goals for my 20's. And now I'm feeling restless. Not vocationally restless, but spiritually restless. Like I have more to receive from and to give to God than what I am currently receiving and giving. During our hour she spoke a whole lot of words into my vocation (intentionally) and my life (unintentionally). She expressed disappointment that I had not come to her earlier in the week so that we could have worked through some of my restlessness more deeply. In the absence of more time, she suggested that I spend the next several months journaling.

The second prodding to write that I've received is from a good friend and colleague in ministry. He encouraged me, for the second time, to take up the discipline in order to cultivate a voice for leadership within the church. I agreed with him, that as we move into a new era within the life of God's Kingdom through the church we need to communicate a vision well. We are right now in a middle space, a time in the history of the church when we as a body are transitioning out of an old way and into a new one. That means facilitating a dignified death for that within the church which no longer serves the Gospel of Jesus Christ. It means also casting a vision and communicating that vision so that the church can move forward faithfully. I've been called into leadership in Christ's church, and so I believe I have some things to say.

I won't promise I'll keep it up. But I do enjoy writing. So we'll see what comes of the venture.

Serendipity or Spirit?

2009-09-29T16:53:00.004-05:00

I had an interesting conversation with a young woman today at the Weatherford Starbucks...a conversation that I might call a little serendipitous. She is a new Christian, a 17 year old college student and a person who has had dealt with more than her share of struggles. I got to invite her to the local Wesley Foundation and to do missions at my church. It wasn't a long conversation but a connection was made.

She and I sat across one another for a long while before talking. We made eye contact a lot of times for some reason before she finally asked me what I was studying. (I wasn't studying but was prepping for tomorrow's Companions in Christ study.) I find this happening to me a lot--noticing people where I go. And I'll be honest. I very rarely talk with people like that. Even when I feel compelled to do so, very rarely do I actually do it. And like today, I sort of always know that there is some stronger force behind it. A lot of people call it serendipity. I call it the Spirit. And instead of me following that voice inside me, she initiated the conversation. And if she hadn't, we would have just passed one another by. It just makes me realize that I should listen to the spirit more. Get over myself--my introvertedness, my busy schedule--and follow the spirit.

Peace
September 29, 2009

Unhappiness and Fear of Strangers

2009-05-06T11:24:00.007-05:00

I heard yesterday on NPR a story about a study done on "Western" countries and how they spend their leisure time--how much sleep on average each country gets, time spent eating and it's correlation with obesity, etc. One of the questions that was asked had to do with contentment--how satisfied on average people were with their lives. They found that those who were happiest were people in Scandinavian countries--Denmark, Norway, Sweden. The country least content with their lives was Italy. And the US stood somewhere near the bottom with great disparity among responders. They said that in the US people were either very dissatisfied or very satisfied but there were few in the middle.

But what I found most interesting about that was the correlation between happiness and willingness to embrace strangers. They said that the Scandinavian countries were characteristically more welcoming of outsiders while Italy tends to be suspicious of strangers. The more people feared outsiders, the less happy they were and vice versa. Now there are a lot of implications in that for our culture, politics, and church (not the least of which has to do with the point that could be easily made that the fear and rejection of the immigrants is actually a detriment to our own personal happiness) but I immediately went to myself in hearing this. I have always longed to be one of those people who just accepts and loves people right off the bat, but instead I tend to pull back. And somewhere deep down I know when I do it that I'm preventing the fullness of my own satisfaction in life. And now there it is in scientific form that it is true.

I wonder how much of this is taught to us by our culture. We long for connection and yet we push it away for the greater good of individual success, personal privacy, and the need for control. What a mess.

K
May 6, 2009

Prayer for those who suffer

2009-04-09T14:24:00.002-05:00

I'm centering my communion meditation for Maundy Thursday on the image of the crucifix--the suffering Christ. So often we protestants see the crucifix as morbid or as a celebration of violence or as a denial of the resurrection. But I came to see it differently a few years ago. In study and conversation, I came to realize that the crucifix showed a divine savior who not only understood but had experienced pain. For those who no very little but suffering that Jesus is one that they can relate to. God can relate to their pain because has experienced it first hand.

So tonight in communion we will be uniting not only with a suffering Christ but a suffering world. After communion, we'll be staying at the altar for an extended time of prayer--intercessory prayer--on behalf of those who are suffering. I thought I'd share the prayer here:

For those who suffer and those who cry this day, give relief from their burdens, dear Lord. Let them experience Your true peace. Love them, Lord, when others cannot. Hold them, Lord, when human arms fail. Hear their prayers, O Lord, and let them hear Your word of peace in their lives.*

We pray now together for all who suffer:

For the Sick—those with cancer, diabetes, heart problems, chronic pain, depression and other clinical illnesses—those that fill hospitals today all over the world, in our own communities and outside, for those with drug addictions. Hear the prayers of our hearts and our voices, O God of healing.

For those who mourn—people who have lost loved ones since this day last year and for those who are reminded of those that are not with them during this holiday weekend. Hear the prayers of our hearts and our voices, O God of comfort.

For those who experience pain because of broken relationships—for the children of broken homes and broken parents, for those going through divorce, for those with strained family and friend relationships. Hear the prayers of our hearts and our voices, O God of reconciliation.

For victims of violence and injustice—people who experience violence within their own homes, victims of rape, for people along the border who have been victims of drug violence, for those who continue to experience the sting of racial and gender inequality, for victims of sex trade and slavery even today. Hear the prayers of our hearts and our voices, O God of justice.

For all those in war-torn countries—for children who must grow up in environments of fear and death, for those in the military and their families, for Darfur, for Israel, for Palestine, for Iraq and Afganistan, for those who have been forced to seek refuge in the United States and other countries. Hear the prayers of our hearts and our voices, O God of peace.

For the poor and those who are struggling economically—for those living on the streets, for people who have lost their homes because of the economic crisis, for people have been or are now facing layoffs and loss of employment, for those already on unemployment, for people all over the world who are exploited by the rich and governmental policies based upon greed, for all other victims of this world-wide economic crisis. Hear the prayers of our hearts and our voices, O God of a plentiful creation.

Bless those who struggle, eternal God,with the comfort of your lovethat they may face each new day with hopeand the certainty that nothing can destroythe good that has been given. May their memories become joyful,their days enriched with friendship,and their lives encircled by your love. **

And Bless us, O God who experiences pain along with us, to be your presence in the midst of a broken and suffering world. Transform us through Jesus’ cross to be truly his hands and feet in communion with all of creation.

*Traditional Catholic Prayer
**http://letspraydaily.blogspot.com/2008/08/prayer-for-those-who-mourn.html

God is Not an American

2008-11-05T12:58:00.004-06:00

I have said many times that seminary is very good at creating crises of faith. In my opinion, they try very hard to do so. They take your "Sunday School Faith" and deconstruct it until you are left with very little. And then you must decided whether or not it is worth it to you to rebuild. Well my crisis came over the realization that there is such a thing as civil religion and that it has invaded the Gospel to the point that our churches cannot differentiate between Christianity and the American "religion of the Republic" (as it was named by Sidney Mead). It came while taking Dr. Tim Lee's History of Christianity I and II, where I read books like this one by George E. Tinker, after having heard lectures by Dr Daisy Machado about how Latinos/as have been continually marginalized not only by our country's people but by our church's people. It came after taking Judaism in America where I was forced to examine the arrogant, Christian-centered assumptions and actions of my country and myself. It came when I realized my own privilege, my own comfortable home in the center when the Gospel would call me to the margins, a reality that I (as I go into my parish life, without the constant reminders of seminary) would much more like to forget then to actually act upon. It came when I realized that there is a pervasive piece of the church that would much rather serve country and culture than Christ.

As I watched this election season unfold, I was struck by how persuasive this civil religion is. How is calls us to believe in the centuries-old rhetoric that would place America as the New Israel, the shining City on a Hill for all of humanity. I read a blog today by Dr. Mark Toulouse, albeit a little late, that put words to my many thoughts as I have watched McCain and Obama throughout this race and reflected on our country. You can catch it here.

What do you think? I know I had to resist very hard the temptation of getting carried away by Obama's religious rhetoric. And although I have more than once been overcome by emotion at the hope I have because Barack Obama, a black man, is president of my country, I must remember that even his perspective is a dangerous one for those of us who profess the Gospel as our highest calling. Comments welcome.

Peace,

Katie

November 5, 2008

My First Album

2008-10-14T22:26:00.003-05:00

So I know this stuff is silly but I love the random things that you can come up with. I followed a formula (posted below) and came up with this: my first musical album. The band name is Maes y Dre Recreation Ground, the Album name is You'll Never Find It, and here's the Album cover.

Maes y Dre Recreation Ground: You'll Never Find It

I'll have something of actually substance to say in the near future... Until then, peace.

Katie

October 14, 2008

How I got this:

InstructionsYour Debut Album

1 - Go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:RandomThe first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

2 - Go to Random quotations: http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3The last four words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album.If you want to do this again, you'll hit refresh to generate new quotes, because clicking the quotes link again will just give you the same quotes over and over again.

3 - Go to flickr's "explore the last seven days" http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

Facebook Status Updaters, I'm talking to you!

2008-10-02T12:37:00.006-05:00

I'm am irritated. And I'm ready for the election to be over. There is something about a political election season that makes for rampant idiocy and unkindness. I find that people take it as a licence to parade around their self-righteous condescension just to bait people. It allows us to make enemies out of people that we do not know so that people can believe that they are therefore free to publicly say any unkind, ignorant, and witless thought that comes to their minds.

Why can't we have an actual conversation about things that actually matter in a way that honors the fact that good people disagree? I guess that is too much to ask for from and "enlightened" nation.

Peace,
Katie

October 2, 2008

Is cuteness as asset for ministry?

2008-10-01T15:48:00.005-05:00

So I've had two funeral situations today. The first was an actually funeral that I helped officiate at another church. I had asked a pastor-friend of mine if he would let me do that since I haven't yet done one. The second was a meeting with a non-member who came by to plan a funeral service for a family member. She and I had never met prior to this but had only spoken on the telephone.

And at both, I got told that I was just so cute. "Just the cutest little thing." "Cute as a button." I find this strange. That is the only time in my several months of ministry as a sole pastor that I've been called cute...at least to my face. (Not that several months is a long time, I know, but to get it two times in one day in reference to me doing funerals is a little strange.) It is as if I can be taken seriously as a minister until it's time for a funeral and then I'm just playing minister with my grown-up friends. I'm not mad or offended. In fact I always like to be called cute as long as it isn't too overtly condescending. I just find it curious. So, yeah, what is up with that?

Katie

October 1, 2008

Why don't I think of these things when they matter?

2008-09-23T16:32:00.004-05:00

Don't you hate it after you've had a conversation with someone--especially a argument or debate or a friendly back and forth--and you think of that perfect thing that you should have said?! That happens to me a lot. And it is most frustrating I have found when it has to do with sermons.

I preached a sermon on a theology of "enough" this week. And I think that probably the most memorable statement in the sermon went something like: "God is not the God of too much. God is the God of enough." Well I've been reflecting on that sermon and how it could have been a little bit more social-gospel focused. And, dang it, wouldn't you know I though of it like an hour after I preached it. I should have said "God is not the God of too much. Especially when so many have to suffer through having too little. God is the God of enough." Dang it, dang it, dang it. I hate it when that happens! Not that it would have changed the sermon too much but it would have gotten my point across a little better.

Tonta! That is all I have to say.

Peace,

Katie

September 23, 2008

Who decided that was a good idea?

2008-09-09T13:32:00.003-05:00

I found this blog today and it made me chuckle. I was especially shocked by this day's posts.

Peace,
Katie
September 9, 2008

Quotable Quotes from Young Adult Summit

2008-09-06T16:30:00.008-05:00

I went to and very much enjoyed the young adult summit put on by the CTC today. It was good to be in a place that affirms the way I think and do things. And it reminded me how important it is to keep in tension the need to relate to my congregation and the need to be myself. Sometimes I think I forget that being a young person is a strength in an effort to pursue relationships with older adults. So in that way, it was very affirming and gave me and my young adultness some much-needed validation.

I also thought it would be good to start a Quotable Quotes series on this blog partly because I like to remember the unorthodox things that people say and partly because so often very profound truths just come and go because we do not bother to write down the words of faithful people. So, here is the first installment of my Quotable Quotes series.

"The real anti-Christ is (s)he that turns the wine of a new idea into the water of mediocrity" --Eric Oafner (sp?)

"We begin to die the day the we are silent about the things that matter." --Martin Luther King Jr.

"Young adults are innately programmed to be better "church people" than those in our pew." --Bill Lizor

"Bidden or not bidden, God is present" --Carl Jung (Thanks to Calia for reminding me of this one.)

"Well, that's all the shiznit I've got..." --DG Hollums

"Its not that young adults don't care about connection or community. It's just that they've found better ways to do it than the church." --Bill Lizor

"Jacob screwed up somethin' crazy..." --Bill Lizor

"There's something very Harlequin romance novel about it" --Bill Lizor, talking about story of Joseph

"If Jesus picked up your church newsletter, would he approve of it?" --Brad Brittain

"I think that in trying to hard to be a Christian nation, we have forgotten how to actually be Christians." --David Kinneman

DG Hollums said a lot of really profound things but I didn't have a pen and the only one I remembered was the one where he said shiznit to a group of middle-aged church people. That shiznit is funny.

Peace,
Katie
September 6, 2008

Word Art

2008-09-04T15:51:00.004-05:00

I just found this website and thought that it was completely awesome. It creates this word art out of anything that you want to put in it. The one above (that can be seen in larger form if you click on it) is made of the words in this blog. So great, right?

Also, this is my friend Trent's facebook status from this morning: "Trent thinks the RNC should be ashamed for mocking community organizers." I couldn't agree more. I was completely outraged when I heard that group of people laughing. Shame on you Rudy Giuliani!!

Thoughts after a crapy sermon

2008-08-29T17:13:00.005-05:00

After last week's disappointing sermon, I'm feeling as though I need to regroup. I learned a few things. Namely, if you're going to mention race in a sermon, do it with great intentionality and not off the cuff. Pause and consider the reason and way that you speak it.

Aside from that piece of last week's sermon, though, it was still wasn't the best homily I've ever delivered. Jerry Chism said at licencing school that you should always be looking for "the rub". That place where belief and unbelief meet, where ordinary becomes extraordinary, where doubts becomes faith and vice versa, where spirit and flesh clash into one another (and by spirit and flesh I mean that Pauline version talking about the present kingdom and the kin-dom come). It is the place where the divine hits real messy life as it is lived. Well, last week I think I forgot that. I cranked out a sermon that was not terrible but mediocre--there is no other word for it. And I've come to the place where I cannot be satisfied with mediocre sermons because I find that they are almost always a product of poor planning and my own disconnectedness with my people, the world, and with God.

So now I'm writing a follow-up sermon on the following text (Romans 12:9-21). It's all about love. And I'm looking forward to it hoping that this week will connect a little better.

And just so you don't think I take myself or my sermons too seriously, I am planning to quote Dwight K. Schrute in my sermon this week. It's gonna be awesome.

(ok...I just spent way too long trying to get a video of Dwight on here. Their html copiable code is not working, so you'll have to go there yourself. Just click on the two links below)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ON0l0KWgucc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lueRaOwFK0Q&feature=related

What a surprise...

2008-08-08T00:28:00.002-05:00

I'm feeling reconnected, rejuvenated, and ready to take on my life and ministry. And this from licensing school.

Things are picking up

2008-08-01T10:50:00.006-05:00

I feel like things are finally starting to pick up...in a lot of good ways and some not so good ways. I've started to establish my own way of doing things with the worship planning and that has gone over really well. It's nice to feel like things aren't constantly getting thrown at you and you a little control over what goes on...or at least the illusion of control. Especially when things do get thrown at you that you really have very little control over--that's when you hang on to the little things that are already set in place. Like, for example, my list of worship songs that is finished for the next two months! I never thought being organized would ever be a source of comfort and joy in my life, but it really is. It's wonderful.

As I write, I am installing the new all-in-one printer, scanner, fax, copier in my office. It is beautiful. Internet last week and a printer that actually works this week. Could life be any better? ;)

Well, I'm off to do office things in my (almost) fully equipped office. Then sermonizing--the great banquet this week! Then I go see Sara! Yay!

Jesus, you frustrate me

2008-07-25T12:35:00.000-05:00

So I'm gearing up to write a sermon for what seems like the 30th week that the lectionary has given me a Kingdom of God Parable to preach on. I think it's really only the third week but it feels like forever. And I'm starting to get a little irritated with Jesus at this point. Why doesn't he just tell us what he means? I mean I know why and I think it's beautiful and everything but it gets a little tiresome trying to make the same point about what the kingdom is week after week in a new way. They don't hear it as the same point but I do. It is always in the back of my mind: kingdom, kingdom, kingdom. Because for me it real is all about the kingdom--the now and the not yet, the thing that drives us and moves us into wholeness, the thing that gives us hope that one day all will be made right. But at some point it all just seems like an abstraction. Something that's been rolling around in the back of my head, that makes sense to me; gives me comfort but isn't gonna make one bit of difference when it comes out of my mouth. How do you preach that week after week in a way that is relatable but doesn't make it commonplace or watered down?

Maybe I'm just frustrated with sermon writing in general. It is a delicate balance that you have to walk...between being responsible to God's hard questions and even harder answers and being responsible to the spiritual needs and expectations of your people. When do you push and when do you hold back? How does one speak prophetic truth and hope/comfort at the same time? And which one is more important?

I don't know, it seems like the way that you do this is to have a rich and messy life yourself. I live so much of my life up in my head and now that I actually get to let that part of me come out on a regular basis, I'm starting to feel like I should live a little more. Don't just think about these things but live into them.

Hmm...this post started out as a lectionary musings but I think I'm going to have to file this one under pastoral self-help. Couple more years of this and I could write a book.

Welp...

2008-07-25T00:38:00.000-05:00

I guess I'm back on the blogosphere. I'm blaming it on lack of sleep. Since starting at the church, I have been struck by how much my life is now about contemplation. I also find myself for the first time in my life dealing with a bit of insomnia. I blame that on this new contemplative (read: stressful) life. A vicious circle.

So I thought I'd start documenting my thoughts, some of which might amount to something. It's more for me than for anybody else, but I'm glad to have any outside company. I'll try not to be too cliche, narcissitic, or boring, though I make no promises. Or melancholy...I often write only when I'm a bit sad. But you can definately call me out on that one. In fact, please do.

With that, all I can say is go see Mamma Mia! It will rock your world and make you want to stop everything and dance. You can dance.

Peace.